Bela Lugosi's Dead

Wanted to watch Dark Eyes Of London last night. Of Bela Lugosi’s films made in Britain, this one is far and away the best. The Mystery Of The Mary (sic) Celeste (I’ve only seen the shortened Phantom Ship version in a mega crackle edition) is pretty intriguing, but, Bela aside, a little lacking in horror. Mother Riley Meets The Vampire (My version masquerades as Vampire Over London) is a riot and well worth watching, although it’s a crime comedy. Hordes of familiar (to people of a certain age) Brit actors (such as Dandy Nichols, Hattie Jacques, Richard Wattis and Dora Bryan) and Bela having a good time. Before chucking on “The Human Monster” (as my disc is named – so that’s all three under alternate titles – Blimey!) I dug out a DVD discovered in a charity shop – Bauhaus – Archive, a compilation of two videotapes (which I owned back in the day) – Shadow Of Light and..er..Archive, and thrilled to Goth pioneers the ‘Haus morosely dirging through their first single Bela Lugosi’s Dead. Terrific stuff. Peter Murphy sends shivers down my spine. (As does Bela Lugosi himself. We start with a view of London’s famous Tower Bridge. The title The Human Monster. And a pair of dark eyes flying towards us. The film halts. The British Board Of Film Censorship’s H (For Horror) certificate appears, and we then gey exactly the same credits except with The Dark Eyes Of London replacing The Human Monster. The original Brit titles. Huzzah! Mind you, the H certificate is a lovely piece of film and horror history. Brought in by a concerned BBFC, ironically as the initial horror boom of the 1930s faded, doubly ironically as such fading was allegedly a result of British flapping about these terrible examples of celluloid, it’s a joy to actually see the thing in all its glory. As an adolescent of the late 1970s I always got a charge from the blood-red X certificate preceding an adults only film. The film itself is based upon an Edgar Wallace novel, and mainly concerns insurance fraud through murder. Fortunately we’re treated to the bodies being fished out of the Thames or washed up on mudflats by eerie fog-shrouded wharfs, a hideous stooge called Jake who’s very frightening, Bela as oily, smarmy insurance agent Dr Orloff (cue Jess Franco) who’s outward appearance as a benevolent philanthropist conceals dark motives (and eyes). There’s also ghastly goings on at a home for the blind (remarkably the real National Society for the Blind assisted in the making of this picture) that (again for people of a certain age and genre predilection) foresees (sorry) the final story in the 1972 big-screen adaptation of Tales From The Crypt.. Most of the investigation is carried out in an almost light-hearted manner by a suave CID man, ably assisted by an American import, snd distracted then assisted by the obligatory love interest. Short, sinister, sparkling and great fun. As does Bela Lugosi himself. We start with a view of London’s famous Tower Bridge. The title The Human Monster. And a pair of dark eyes flying towards us. The film halts. The British Board Of Film Censorship’s H (For Horror) certificate appears, and we then gey exactly the same credits except with The Dark Eyes Of London replacing The Human Monster. The original Brit titles. Huzzah! Mind you, the H certificate is a lovely piece of film and horror history. Brought in by a concerned BBFC, ironically as the initial horror boom of the 1930s faded, doubly ironically as such fading was allegedly a result of British flapping about these terrible examples of celluloid, it’s a joy to actually see the thing in all its glory. As an adolescent of the late 1970s I always got a charge from the blood-red X certificate preceding an adults only film. The film itself is based upon an Edgar Wallace novel, and mainly concerns insurance fraud through murder. Fortunately we’re treated to the bodies being fished out of the Thames or washed up on mudflats by eerie fog-shrouded wharfs, a hideous stooge called Jake who’s very frightening, Bela as oily, smarmy insurance agent Dr Orloff (cue Jess Franco) who’s outward appearance as a benevolent philanthropist conceals dark motives (and eyes). There’s also ghastly goings on at a home for the blind (remarkably the real National Society for the Blind assisted in the making of this picture) that (again for people of a certain age and genre predilection) foresees (sorry) the final story in the 1972 big-screen adaptation of Tales From The Crypt.. Most of the investigation is carried out in an almost light-hearted manner by a suave CID man, ably assisted by an American import, snd distracted then assisted by the obligatory love interest. Short, sinister, sparkling and great fun.